So as you have all seen I recently had my heart broken by my Hollywood Husband Adam Baldwin. He had played such an important role in my life for so many years and then I accidentally on purpose learned too much about him. Then I really got talking to him and heard first hand things that I’ll never be able to erase from my mind. Adam Baldwin, my Jayne Cobb, my John Casey…was a right wing extremist. He may disagree with that title but it works for me.
So now when I closed my eyes and thought about Jayne Cobb, he would ultimately begin talking to me about the evils of Howard Zinn or how the wonder of President Bush. Talk about a mood killer. So I explained all this to Adam, and he finds it amusing. The nerve. I asked him if he could recommend a new Hollywood Husband and he replied, “I’m not a Yenta”. Thanks for the help Adam. I then explained that when he goes on auditions he must be surrounded by other “Adam Baldwin” types. Or maybe his stunt double…So far he has been no help, apparently there are other more important things in his life than making me happy.
But this is exactly why I have now published a Want ad detailing exactly who I am and what I want from my new Hollywood Husband. Right wing extremists need not apply.
I’m a busy woman. When I’m home I never stop. I am the mother to three wonderful but high maintenance boys. Jason is 5, Spencer is 2 and Tim is 31. Whether it is doing laundry, running errands or making dinner I am always on the go. Real life is a blessing and one I would never give up. However sometimes I need an escape. I am seeking a Hollywood Husband to sweep me off my feet into the world of make believe. Requirements are as follows:
Must specialize in heroic character acting
Must have large biceps and triceps
Must look handsome with a goatee
Must harbor a soft side
Must be willing to fight for me above all else
Must NOT hold any political opinions (this one is especially important)
Must not be too famous as I have issues with sharing
Being married is acceptable but not to anyone in the spotlight
Real life criminal records frowned upon
Must enjoy long walks on the beach (just kidding I’ve just always wanted to say that)
As you can see I’ve incorporated some real life aspects into my requirements as I have been burned in the past. But technically speaking I’m really only interested in what you offer me in my own day dreams. I’ll be taking applications over the next few days. If anyone has recommendations please feel free to include them in the comment section along with a link to said actors work.
I woke, she fled, and day brought back my night.
edgar allen poe
MySentimentExactLee
My good friend Cat from the blog http://3kidsandus.com recommended I have my husband Tim on my show this Thursday night as my guest. At first I laughed, but then I realized the potential this holds. My viewers can ask him questions about anything. I mean literally anything. Blogging, sex, ME. He is one of those brutally honest people and I promise I can’t bribe him for silence. It just doesn’t work that way.
